As a woman, I have had many roles in my life so far, I am not just talking about my career, its more than that. I am a councellor, a mum, a nurse, a cleaner (although my husband is a better cleaner than I, thank you love) a sister, a girlfried, a fiance, a baker, a confectioner a wife and so the list goes on. Infact I could probably continue for quite a while.
When one of things comes to an end, or changes in some way, such as children leaving home, going to university and flying the nest into the big wide world, we stop and take stock of where we are. It can sometimes feel frightening, as you can suddenly get to a point where you don’t really know who you are anymore. Let me clarify that a bit. You were a mum 24/7 now you are not, it can be as simple as that. Now you are still there when they need your support, they have not cut every apron string. However there is no getting away from it, It is hard, much harder than I thought. In this article I talk of women, because that is who I am, but I know for a fact that men find it hard too. That bond between child and parent is fiercly strong, and when it has been changed in some way, it can feel like your heart has been broken. however much as women we try to be independant, career driven beings, or the ceo of the business that is home. Eg keeping everything flowing. If you have kids leaving home, or your circumstances have changed, I have one simple question…
Who are you?
You may think you know who you are, what you like, the passtimes you have, the books you read, etc etc. Then your cherished one goes to university, leaves home, now you still think you know who you are, But it beomes apparent that maybe you are just not sure of what you like or dislike anymore, you feel lost, and invisible, what is you role in the house.
- As I write this, I am reminded of another group of people who may no longer fully aware of their role. When you have had a trauma and say you have the inability to walk, or the illness you have been diagnosed with consumes you in those first months or even years, you will question what your role is, and how or if you can get back to being your sense of normal.
If this is you, I would love to hear your story, where you were and where you are now. What have you done and how life has changed. You emotions are quite normal, you have had a massive change. I would like to help you through this change, so you can become the whole picture and not the invisible one.